104 Comments
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Candy Downs's avatar

Haha this is awesome! Thanks for including me friend💛

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The Cultural Romantic's avatar

lol this is so funny!! And I completely agree about Kate being so nice. 😀😆

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Nathalie Martinek PhD's avatar

Love this compilation and your attention to detail. Thank you for including me and my weird obsession with dysfunctional behavioural patterns!

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Kryptogal (Kate, if you like)'s avatar

Damn you hit this shit right in the middle of the bullseye from whatever is a really far distance to do such things but I have no sense of distance. 👏👏

I have no idea whether or not Rohan Ghostwind is hot, but like...his name is Rohan Ghostwind. I could sit and try to think of "names for the hot seductive male hero of my erotic fantasy novel" for like three months and not come up with one that good. So since he came up with it, I'm thinking maybe he doesn't have quite as much of the strenuously principled objection to such novels as one might surmise, based on his pieces. In fact I'm now lowkey semi-suspicious he might have a sidegig writing them, and his posts here are catharsis for the terrible pressure of having to constantly produce such fantasies for the voracious appetites of his all-lady audience. Or at least, I will choose to believe this bc it's kind of fun. 😊

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The Cultural Romantic's avatar

Hahaha love it 🤣🤣

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Tom Van Valkenburgh's avatar

Sadly, he could also be that 350 pounder on a cot in his mom’s basement. If so I hope you never find out so your fantasy stays ideal.

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

I love this potential Rohan-as-secret-romantasy-aurhor arc. I want it to be true.

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Kryptogal (Kate, if you like)'s avatar

If we just believe hard enough, it can be true. 🤞

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Anuradha Pandey's avatar

Well he’s a Jane Austen fan so it’s totally possible

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Some Vicious Mole's avatar

Wait, there’s another guy running “I like Jane Austen” game on here? Unacceptable.

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H.J. Zhou's avatar

Rohan, please notice this and give the people what they want

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Nicholas Kircher's avatar

Heeeey I got a handwritten mention! I knew I was somewhere off the map! Alright, made my week with that. 😁 and I can concur with Amelia being in all the good lists

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Mike Hind's avatar

What's funny is seeing that I'm not the only one who wonders how hot the people behind words are

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

I'm glad I'm not the only one, too, lol

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Laggy's avatar

Me and Phisto not on here. Ghey.

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

Your subtype needs more careful consideration before it's revealed to the public.

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Laggy's avatar

Awwwwweeeee ❤️

Once I get the categorization, I’m gonna get a therapist, and if they don’t agree, I’m gonna open hand slap them across the temple and tell them they suck and they’re wrong.

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

Hell yeah, you tell em.

Also, you were supposed to be on the “Guys Who Just Showed Up One Day and Started Being Funny Right Off the Bat” list! This tragic error will be remedied.

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Laggy's avatar

Humor is all I got homegirl

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Talie — Very Freqy Girl®'s avatar

*suddenly has list fomo

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Drunk Wisconsin's avatar

Very pleased to have been posting in such a manner that my entire being can be pinpointed with precision.

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Michael Boccio's avatar

thank you for mapping this out! gonna do a free sub to each individual

am very process oriented and like your writing. shit clicks with me

genuinely curious what your opinion is on the Tortuga organization? too new to Substack and cannot adequately assess risk of associating/engaging and helping/benefiting from an organization that I perceive has really good process even if the outcomes are currently mediocre

this class shit sucks with what is acceptable and what is not, which is why I find Anuradha fascinating

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Mikala Jamison's avatar

This is so fucking hilarious and I'm glad to be included

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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

This was the best thing to wake up to on a gorgeous Sunday morning. So hilarious and well-done. Honored to be mentioned amongst the coolest and ephemeral-est group of women.

As for the “nice” part, 3 out of 4 ex boyfriends would vehemently disagree :)

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

You're nice to me, that's all that counts 😂

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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

I could never be mean to a pretty, funny girl with good taste in music! Only boys.

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

🥹

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Alex Kaschuta's avatar

Thanks for the inclusion in the mystery category, I’m also more of a Twitter character and I also have no idea what I’m about anymore. So… apt.

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Everyman's avatar

The Carl Linnaeus Substack needs

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Everyman's avatar

Oh and for re-feministing—I’d add Stephanie Murray and maybe Elizabeth Grace Matthews + Ivana Greco for more sensible conservative takes

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

Some of them sound familiar, I'll check them out! Thanks for the recommendations 😊

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Lirpa Strike's avatar

Hell yeah, taxonomy goals

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Tim Levin's avatar

Ok, this is really good. I foresee a tattered printed copy of this with lots check marks and arrows drawn, etc.

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